by Chad Lewis on April 26, 2006
This past weekend I had some friends come into town. What do old friends usually talk about? That’s right – relationships. This has been the most exciting time of my 31 year life in regards to relationships as I’m preparing to enter into a marriage with my best friend and biggest supporter on earth. Ginger and I both love to share the story of how God brought us together.
In relaying this story, I was quick to add to my single friends about some of my frustration in the past concerning advice given by those who had walked the road before me. Much of the advice I got seemed very much like a magic formula to repel singleness and catch a mate. A few times I received the advice to stop looking and then God would be sure to provide someone really soon. However, when after months turn into years, one has to wonder about the advice.
I never did buy into these thoughts hook, line and sinker, but they did plague me on occasion. What I have found to be true is both liberating and beautiful. We all have different stories. In Psalm 139, David declares that God has written all the days David would live in His book before one of them was even lived!
As we apply this to our lives, the implications are wonderfully exciting. God decides what is best for our lives. He asks us to give our lives to Him completely and trust Him with all that He gives and all that He takes away. He is not some cruel God saying, “I wish they would stop looking for a mate so I could finally bless them with one.” No, God is working out whatever He wills and I have said many times, the best thing in the whole universe for us is God, Himself.
He is writing a different story with all of our lives. We are sometimes bruised and battered. We are sometimes joyful and full of rejoicing. Through it all, we must surrender each day and trust that He knows what is best.
One of the greatest song lines I have ever heard was written by Rich Mullins. He sings, “I’d rather fight You for something I don’t really want than take what You give that I need.” I find myself doing that so much. I have fought God for different things and in reality, I was blinded to the fact that I didn’t really want those things. The encouraging thing is that God knew what was best. And in my life, He took me through 31 years before He provided me with a helpmate. In His good plan, He ripped a relationship from my hands that I thought would end in marriage three years ago, but He knew best. I am so glad that God did not give me what I thought I wanted. I would not be the person I am today.
So as you are giving advice, don’t put handcuffs on God. He works in everyone’s lives and He is writing different stories for us all. All of these stories will one day bring glory to God as we sit around and discuss how awesome our God is for all eternity.
by Chad Lewis on March 28, 2006
William Cowper was a hymn writer during the days of John Newton. Cowper struggled from the deepest depressions and most of his life was marked by darkness. John Newton was a friend and pastor to Cowper and he encouraged him to write hymns along with him as it might be good therapy for the soul. One of those hymns is called “God Moves in a Mysterious Way.” The lyrics are listed below.
God moves in a mysterious way
His wonders to perform;
He plants His footsteps in the sea
And rides upon the storm.
Deep in unfathomable mines
Of never failing skill
He treasures up His bright designs
And works His sovereign will.
Ye fearful saints, fresh courage take;
The clouds ye so much dread
Are big with mercy and shall break
In blessings on your head.
Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,
But trust Him for His grace;
Behind a frowning providence
He hides a smiling face.
His purposes will ripen fast,
Unfolding every hour;
The bud may have a bitter taste,
But sweet will be the flower.
Blind unbelief is sure to err
And scan His work in vain;
God is His own interpreter,
And He will make it plain.
Though the entire hymn has ministered to many, one line has become more famous than the others. “Behind a frowning providence, He hides a smiling face.”
As we walk on this road of life, we often cannot trace God’s hand at work in our lives. We may be in the fiery furnace as the flames blaze out of control. From there, we may find ourselves in the cold, dark room of deepest doubt. In these times, events in life are hard to explain and sin often looks good when we perceive God to be bad.
But the truth remains – God is ALWAYS good! Though He sees you in your heartache or storm right now, He sees how He is going to use this in your life to bring glory to Him and to draw you to Himself. He is working ALL things together for good… (Romans 8:28-29)
Several years ago as I struggled with singleness, I had an impression in my heart during one of my loneliest times. The impression was that even though God was seeing me devestated in my heartache, He was also seeing me in the joy of my wedding day. The goodness of God allowed me to struggle so that I would know Him more and learn to trust His hand.
A few years ago, I lost what I thought was the fulfillment of that promise. But I stand here three years later and am engaged to the woman who is my best friend and helpmate. The frowning providence of God pulling the other relationship away has brought me to this moment of marriage. He is good! He is in control! He is at work and He is smiling because He knows the end result of all of His children – eternity with Him!
by Chad Lewis on September 11, 2005
This is an excerpt from an email I sent to a friend tonight.
Hey, I believe my heart can coincide and agree with you. Circumstances shouldn’t dictate our joy, but they quite often do.
So 31 and still no blips on the radar for me? Somehow, it is O.K. tonight though. On many, many nights it has not been O.K. I have tried thinking of the shortness of time here on earth and how God might most be glorified in my life. I think of my friend and mentor Rich Malone (Director of Lake Forest Ranch) and how he got married at 35 and has 4 awesome kids now… I think of you and how much I struggled with singleness at your age and then wonder where the last years went. It is hard brother. It is so very hard. And though this may not help the aching, I will say what I have told myself many days. You don’t have to make it through singleness for the rest of your life… You just have to live through it today. What I mean is that we will never know what tomorrow holds and we cannot expect grace to be given for next year because it is only available in the moment.
We get overwhelmed and think there is no way we can make it through the rest of our life without that special someone – it is overwhelming for me, but in reality, I just have to make it through today without her. And what do I have instead of her? I have God Himself. His grace can only be experienced in this moment and as we dwell on the future, we won’t live in today. Tomorrow we will find grace for each second, but we must live in the here and now for tomorrow is not guarenteed.
So there is the struggle. Truthfully, I don’t do very well on many days when I’m in the mire of loneliness and I hang out there a good bit. It seems so easy for some people. They meet a girl, they date and they are married. We are the ones that not much comes easy to. It is more frustrating when we have something wonderful in front of us and then it is taken away – but we move on. We will last and God’s will will be done.
My brother, thanks for sharing and I will pray for you as you pray for me,
Stay strong in the word,
Chad
This past weekend I had some friends come into town. What do old friends usually talk about? That’s right – relationships. This has been the most exciting time of my 31 year life in regards to relationships as I’m preparing to enter into a marriage with my best friend and biggest supporter on earth. Ginger and I both love to share the story of how God brought us together.
